


The Story of Us

by jellyfishandtuna



Category: X-Men - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-09-23
Updated: 2014-09-23
Packaged: 2018-02-18 13:28:31
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 22
Words: 20,717
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2350049
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jellyfishandtuna/pseuds/jellyfishandtuna
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              
<p></p><div class="center">
  <p>Jean Grey is teleported back to the 70s after Logan killed her.</p>
</div>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Written by two different writers.  
> Mistakes are our own.  
> Being opened minded is key here.

The mansion was quiet these days. The grass grown up around the grounds. It was in quite the disarray. Everything changed after the bullet ripped into Charles spine and confide him to a wheel chair. The gate stayed locked, the students and every one else gone. All but him and Hank. Hank had stuck around. Every thing changed with that one bullet.

He would cry out in the middle of the night. The voices of thousands of mutants echoing in his mind. He would go for days without sleep, without eating and slowly, a bottle became his best friend. Six months later is when Charles started to shot Hank's serum into his veins.He found that he could walk again, sleep again without feeling the pain from mutants around the world. The only drawback; Charles lost his powers. He could live with this. He was already broken so who the hell would care.

Mid day, Charles didn't know what day it was nor did he care. The bottle half empty and the glass being held between his fingers. There was a sudden rumbling. The building began to shake and it made him stall in the middle of the stairs. "England doesn't bloody have earthquakes." His voice slightly slurred as he spoke. The shacking lasted for a good ten minutes. The sounds of glass falling and breaking making him cringe. "Hank, what the bloody hell have you blew up now?" As the shaking subsided, he slowly started walking down the rest of the stairs.

~

Memories flashed behind her eyes, the professor had been killed by her hands, countless people she had tried to help at his school destroyed because of her powers and Magneto manipulating her. What could she do she fought and clawed, cursing and screaming wanting to gain control even for the briefest of moments she wanted all the death to stop. She was a healer, not a killer but to every one she came in contact with she was no longer the happy caring Jean Grey, she was the mutant the evil dark phoenix. The final battle came and it had taken all of her almost destroying what bit of Jean that was left to stop the phoenix and beg Logan to kill her. She could see the heart in his eyes at the request, she hated to ask him knowing how he felt but she couldn't be allowed to live and without any further talk she felt the cold unbreakable steel slide through her stomach. The faint trace of blood left her lips and her body fell limp, darkness consumed her and she found peace.

It didn't seem to last the quiet she could here the phoenix thrashing trying to revive it's self but she fought back just has hard pushing her behind the walls Xavier had built. "Don't let it consume you." His last words to her and she had. She had failed him and hated herself for it the fight seemed to shake the whole world and finally when the powers went quiet she felt grass underneath her, sun on her face. She was confused and breathing, Logan hadn't managed to kill her but he had helped enough to put her back in control, slowly her eyes opened and she could see the lawn and some of the wall that belonged to the school. She could almost cry at how beautiful it looked she slowly rose to her knees eyes scanning over her clothes were tattered the dark red dress barely anything any more than a dirty rag. She was surrounded by ash as well the trademark of her code name, slowly rising she began walking to the door .

Opening the door her eyes fell over the familiar design of the school dark auburn hair clung to her pale skin, and it wasn't until the voice hit her ears that green hues snapped to the stairs. She stood there stunned for a moment, was that Charles sure he was younger but there was something about the way he looked and those eyes. Blue hues she'd known for the longest of times, much before he could speak she had walked forward. "Professor?" Her voice was raspy as if she hadn't had a drink in ages. Nor had she made note of the bruises are the healing marks where Logan had pierced her. She looked like hell or at least like she had seen it .


	2. Chapter 2

The voice at the bottom of the stairs gave him slight pause. "There is no "Professor" here." If it came out harsh or cold, he wasn't paying much attention, the glass rose to his lips as the last drank was swallowed. "He died a long time ago." His voice seemed to tend somber at the words. True, the Professor died years ago when he was shot. Now, he was simple Charles. "Just Charles will do. HANK!" The name echoed through the empty halls. "We have another stray." He walked past her. If Charles had his powers he would know who she was and were she was from. A rather tall man enters, glasses over his eyes and a confused look on his face as Charles disappeared into the kitchen. 

"Are you okay?" Hank's tone was softer then Charles but he was also interested in knowing where the woman came from. "Are you hurt? Do you even know what year it is?" He looked at her clothes. "And I am sure that we can find you something other then these rags and don't mind him." His voice almost sounded whimsical. "He's been in a bad mood since 1968." There was a slam of a pot in the kitchen. "I heard that!" Charles half slurred voice rang from the open kitchen door. 

"Feed her. Cloth her. Send her on her way. Money's in the cabinet." Particles of dust followed after him and where lost to the darkness where there was once sun as he trailed back up the stairs. "Don't you even want to know who she is?" Hank called after him. "Not really!" His voice yelled back as his bedroom door slammed. All Hank could do was sigh beside her. "Are you hungry? It's stocked but never get's eaten. Well, least not by him." 

In the room, Charles lay across the bed, not even caring that dust was flying around his room. If he had his powers, he would most likely be able to find out who this woman was. If he were the old Charles, he might have even brought himself to care. Groaning, the man rolled over, staring at the ceiling. This once grand mansion was now falling into disarray around him. Charles had lost his hope, he was broken and didn't know if there was any way to fix himself.

~

She couldn't remember the professor every drinking and almost seemed distraught by his tone with her. Keeping her mouth closed she was almost brought to tears by hearing Hank, she didn't know how much she could say or if she should say a thing at all. Watching him retreat up the stairs she turned her back and began to walk the halls with him. "I actually do not know what year it is. " Her voice sounded almost puzzled by the question, arms moving to cross over the exposed parts of her torso. She knew that year, it was when Charles lost his ability to walk but if this was the case. Green hues trailed back to the stair case. "You can't send me back out there I'll damage the world." She had no idea if she referred more to where she was from or the demon who was resting quietly in her mind pushed back by what little strength she did possess. She felt drawn back to his words and gave a soft smile. "I'm fine I promise Hank." She spoke with kindness towards the man in fact she couldn't even manage to drown out the tone that she had known him for years. Known this school for years and here it was in such a shameful state.

Moving past the kitchen she headed towards the back where her room would be in the future. "I'll take a shower?" Her voice was more of a question towards him than anything. Her mind still to focused on the Professor to really wait for an answer. Slipping into the room she closed the door and disrobed, passing the mirror she could see each bruise the phoenix had left on her pale flesh, though she hoped a good amount was dirt. Slender fingers ghosted over Logan's marks they were fading but she could still feel them and god did it hurt. Quieting the gasp that wanted to leave her lips she turned the shower on. He never talked about the past was this why, had he lost so much, her inner thoughts could have been loud but she did her best to shield.

After the shower she felt clean, most of the bruises faded and hidden away she gave a sigh of relief pulling long auburn hair into a pony tail she wrapped a towel around her frame. An outfit was on the bed simple enough green shirt slightly to big and a pair of pants and tennis shoes. Dressing was sort of a mindless task, she was thankful for the room looked much the same in the future she thought, a soft rap against the door and Hank's voice sounded on her ears about dinner. Slowly she moved leaning against the door. "I'm still not hungry but I need to talk to Charles." She might not be able to tell him where she was from but she couldn't leave, she had no idea how time travel worked let alone the damage she could cause if she was set loose on the world. Hank seemed to try and talk her out of it but she frankly didn't care for his permission, that had always been the true Jean over caring, over protective .

After a small argument which she had won by making a bet of at least getting him to eat she walked up the stairs to softly rap her hands against the door. "Charles, can I come in?" She was going to one way or the other but she thought to at least ask. When she received no answer she opened the door prepared just in case he thought to throw a bottle.


	3. Chapter 3

Hank looked at her with some more mild confusion. "It's 1972." He tilted his head, watching her. He did get the odd feeling that he knew this woman from somewhere, he just couldn't figure out where. "I don't even want to begin to understand why you can't go back outside." He couldn't help but give a nervous laugh as he spoke. Nodding as she spoke of being fine. "Okay, yeah. Take a shower if you want. I'm sure you'd like to clean up. I'll just be outside." And with that, he left as she disappeared into the room, acting as if she knew this mansion like the back of her hand. 

As Hank stood in the kitchen, he could hear random things rolling around the floor on Charles room. Wondering just exactly what he was doing in that room. Finally deciding to put himself to good use and make a few sandwiches. He just wished Charles would eat. Not drown himself in a bottle and be lost for days. Hearing her words made him jump slightly, lost in his own thoughts. Nodding when he heard of speak of maybe getting him to eat something, he let the small argument drop, watching as she disappeared up the stairs, sighing. He hoped against hope that someone, anyone would be able to help him. 

The palms of his hands were pressed hard into his eyes, his mind started to race with memories. Not voices and they scared him more. Inhaling sharply as a quiet sob escaped his lips. He didn't answer the soft voice at his door nor did he have the will to even want to throw anything at it. He could smell whatever shampoo she used and it once again sent a flood of memories into his mind. "Please." His voice sounded broken. "Just leave me alone. I'm not this Professor or the man that you might have known years ago. Everything that was is no more." He kept his hands on his eyes.

~

Covered in darkness the only light that could be seen came from the door behind her, when it fell on Charles she almost lost it. Knowing if he knew who she was she could be snippy and snarky and make him change but this Charles this broken man she would have to be-careful or he'd send her out on her bottom something she just couldn't risk. No matter how she wanted to react the small sob that muffled from him drew her eyes and her mind solely on him. She knew she probably should just leave, she shouldn't be toying with the past but she had to help him no matter what effect it would have. With slow movement she stepped forward the door closing behind her has the scent of booze filled her nose. Holding back any signs of her noticing she knelt in front of him .

Her slender fingers would ghost up his forearms, bright green hues watching him for any sign of withdrawal so she could move away. When she noticed nothing she made her way to rest her fingers against his temples. "Hush Charles, I'm here for you." She wouldn't let him pull away managing to at least push forward enough power to help block out whatever was harming him. At the same time she was keeping her shield present not wanting to reveal the future. "Look I know you may not want me here but I'm here rather you wish me to be or not. " Her face seemed to look fallen. "I can't go outside. " The feeling once again dredged up was this because of the past or her own powers scared her so much. She knew staying near Charles could help and she would honestly just hide out on the grounds if he argued with her .

Hoping her power was soothing him she moved closer, she didn't know why but even seeing Charles like this she felt the closeness that was between them, that had always been there. She hoped she could at least get him to feel better maybe well enough to eat, and she tried not to dig in his head but she could feel the hurt, betrayal, memories flooding him. It was enough to break any one, and she had never seen this man so hurt. He had always been so brave for every one at the school.


	4. Chapter 4

Her voice was soft when it hit his ears. The feeling of her delicate fingers against his temples causing him to still for a moment. "You're a telepath." His voice was still slightly broken as he spoke to her. The serum the reason he couldn't feel her powers when she first entered the mansion. His voice wasn't as slurred as it had been downstairs and he couldn't help but to focus on her fingers, massaging away at what fears he had. He let out a soft gasp as he felt the eb of everything in his mind etching away. 

"Why can't you leave?" His throat felt like it didn't want to work, constricting as he tried to control the flow of everything that was pushing down on his chest. "And I never said that I didn't want you here. Or did I." He opened his eyes, blue hues piercing into green as her fingers continued to work their magic. "Who are ?" They narrowed slightly, not wanting to scare her away but wanting answers. 

He slowly rose, her hands slipping away from his head as he moved off the bed, turning in the darkness like he'd lost something. "Who are you? What are you doing here and what do you want?" His head down the whole time that he was talking, kicking an empty bottle under the bed as he went. "Did Erik send you? Maybe Raven? Wanting to know if Charles has finally lost his marbles." There was anger starting to rise in his voice but it wasn't directed toward her. A syringe laying on the table with a golden like substance in it. Falling to his knees as he looked under the bed, grabbing his belt. "Because you can go back to where ever you bloody well came from and tell them to fuck off." This time his tone was harsh, narrowing his eyes at her and tilting his head. "WHO ARE YOU?!" It was all but screamed at her as he began to shake, the serum coursing through his veins starting to wear off.

~

They sat in silence for what seemed like hours the slow eb of his memories fading and she was close to breathing a sigh of relief. He spoke his voice still weak and it broke her heart, she didn't need to answer this first question wondering what her powers were the fact being it was clear by the way her voice projected in his mind. It was the second question she felt a small amount of fear work it's way into knots and by the third she was at a loss, did she tell him or did she lie? What could one person who wasn't even sure of how or why she'd ended up anywhere near this man or this school say to him. She didn't feel fear with the way his voice pitched nor with the glance that would surely knock someone like Magneto down a peg,she felt sadness .

He moved from her grasp leaving pale hands to fall to the side and a confused expression across her face. The question repeated of asking who she was, and yet again all she could do was stare blankly mouth slightly agape has if she refused to believe this was the man she would come to know in t he future. Erik and Raven her face seemed to contract drawing a blank on the names, it took her several moments to piece together the names with who they belonged to.Magneto and Mystique people she had no desire of running into even in this point in time. Her body seemed to droop at the anger in his tone he'd been doing so well, did he hold such little trust? Finally having enough she stood eyes only briefly catching the syringe, she wouldn't allow herself to dwell on the fact he might be addict as well as an alcoholic . 

She never needed the contact to touch someone to make them listen to her and she asserted herself by broadcasting loud enough to block every other voice from Charles head. ;"I am Jean Grey, and I'm a friend not of theirs but of yours.";Even though she spoke loud enough in his mind to drown out other voices in reality she was talking softly, more afraid of her scaring him away the other way around. ;"I'm a telepath and I can't leave because I don't belong out there. I have only ever belonged here."; Her voice seemed to feel with sadness at the end, but it was true even her parents had been to happy to be rid of such a powerful mutation. It was Charles who showed her she wasn't a monster, it was him who had set up the blocks to her power in the first place and right now they needed major repair, less the monster inside her reawaken to destroy this time line.


	5. Chapter 5

Sitting in the chair in front of the desk, he listened to her. Letting her words and that sweet voice, god why did it seem so familiar yet not, spoke into his mind. He didn't mean to hurt her but he knew that the harshness of his tone, well his manner in a whole was something that most people weren't use to. "I don't know a Jean Grey." The words were muffled as the belt was wrapped around his arm, pulling it as tightly as possible with his teeth. His brow arched as he turned his head to look at her. This time there was a softness around those glossy blue hues. Intense but less harsh and he couldn't help but smirk. "And I've not hard friends in quite some time. Most people." The tapping of his hand hitting the vein in his arm echoed through the stillness of the room. "Stay away from crazy, drunk Charles Xavier." 

"And no." His voice seemed to grow softer as he spoke, a thin sweat starting to form over his brow. "It's not what you think. I drink. I'm not a junkie." Tapping the syringe, he leaned his head back as the tip of the needle was pushed into his flesh. An almost erotic gasp leaving his lips as the golden serum was pumped into his vein. "It's for." His words were trailed off by a sigh of relief. "And why am I telling you this. I shouldn't have to explain myself." There was something in her tone that made Charles want to believe everything she said. Something in the way she moved, the way her body drooped with sadness. 

"Listen." The needle is removed and throw against the table. "I'm sorry." His tone starting to mask the Charles that she knew; soft, understanding and filled with care. "I'm not use to having people around anymore, other then Hank." The belt is slowly removed with a groan as he rose from the chair, discarding it on the table as well. He walked over, kneeling beside her. "You can stay here as long as you like until you get back on your feet. I don't know who you are or what's happened to you but you do seem lost. Hope is never something one should give up on but you seem to be under the assumption that you're either going to hurt someone or they are going to hurt you." Sitting on the edge of the bed, he couldn't help the heavy sigh. "Let's start over." Charles cleared his throat, giving her the gentleman she'd always known. "I'm Professor Charles Francis Xavier and I too have lost my way."

~

She wasn't surprised to hear him say he didn't know who she was, she didn't even exist yet and wouldn't for a few years. She watched the movements of the cold rubber was wrapped against his arm and the syringe drew the gold liquid to it's center. It was the next part her eyes drifted on she saw the track marks, tale tell signs of a junkie. Even if it wouldn't kill him, he used it like a drug that much she could numbing away the pain instead of embracing it. She said nothing she had no right after all this was his path to walk. He was a far step from the man he would become, disheveled and drunk. Shaking her head she wouldn't let these thoughts consume her, Charles was Charles and that its what mattered.

She had no reason to lie to him but the sounds the pure enjoyment he got from a needle in his veins almost made her ill with an itch to raise her hand and slap the relief that flooded his face. Pausing her deep green hues looked away from him trailing across each and every empty bottle that adorned his floor. A loose curl of auburn hair hide her gaze from his.;"No you don't know me, just as I don't know why you want to tell me."; Her voice was soft but tinged with sadness he would never be able to explain. Her slender fingers edged playing with the frayed sheet on his bed, it wasn't until she felt him beside her that she turned to look at him and an almost audible sigh of relief washed her own face. His eyes that was the man she knew the one who had given her home and seemed was giving her one once more. It took restraint not to wrap her arms around his neck in that moment a flash of the real Jean the happy woman.

She didn't say that no matter how much she tried she couldn't leave the school, she was the monster that set rights for mutants back hundreds of years. The phoenix ,she felt a wave of nausea and dizziness hit her with the name. The pain was scripted across her face, the power wasn't awake yet that was just a mere stirring of the power she couldn't contain and this Charles couldn't help her not how he was at the moment. The minute the abyss seemed to pass her eyes faded back to a dim green and she gave a faint smile. "You will be joining us for dinner won't you ?"; It was clear he was going to eat one way or another and that she was unwilling to talk of the power out break just a moment before.


	6. Chapter 6

He moved the strand of auburn hair away from her face, giving him the catch to stare into her eyes. "I don't eat... much anymore. Food isn't really on the menu for me." He couldn't stop the ping or the hitch in his heart at the sadness that flashed across her face before she regained herself. A sigh escaped his lips as he slid to the floor beside her, head leaning back against the bed. "When I was shot..." His voice seemed pained as he started. "And I really don't know why I'm telling you this but it. I've been alone far too long other then Hank." Charles closed his eyes and tried to relax. 

"When I was shot on that beach, my life seemed to go downhill. I couldn't walk. Everyone and everything I loved and cared for seemed to be taken away from me and I was truly alone. Left alone with the voices of millions of mutants across the span of the Earth. It was maddening." Absentmindedly, he pushed up the sleeve of his dressing gown, the tracks on his arm now close enough that she could see. "I'm not on drugs. Well, not the hard kind anyway. What I inject is a serum that Hank discovered. It suppresses my powers so that I can rest and it gives me back the use of my legs." His hand moved to his face, pinching the bridge of his nose with a sigh. 

"I use to have control. I didn't use to be this broken. This shell of the man that I use to be. I use to be..." His voice started to crack as he fault to control his emotions. "Well respected and adored by many. My research on mutants is still being used worldwide to help humans better understand our kind but this." He gestured toward his body with a shaky hand. "When these come back." Pointing to his legs. "This comes back." His hand moves to his head. "That's when they all come back." Meaning the voices in his head that weren't his own. "It's absolutely maddening and I have no idea what happened to me. I wasn't lying when I said that the Professor you might have known is gone. Lost in a world that he can not escape nor does he want to at this moment." He opened his eyes, trying and failing to hide the tears that pooled. "I've lost my way and I haven't a clue of how to find myself again." He turned his head, staring into those warm green hues with all the pain he was feeling in his heart. "You're turn, my dear and then I promise, I'll eat something."

~

Her ears clung to every word he said, the Professor she knew never told this story never mentioned how hollow he had become after the shooting. Though the the more she thought on it how else could he be, not just the strong man she knew that would be .. Her thoughts trailed off once more listening to his voice, even in this state she found it soothing. She was content to listen for hours until she heard those words, of course he would want to know who she was. In her words she was a nightmare something that should be locked away least she harmed more innocent people. Finally breaking her slender frame rose turning her back to him.

"You won't believe me, but I won't lie Charles." Her voice was soft tinged with a sad undertone. She would not revel the secrets of the future only small pieces. An audible gulp has she thought of him lifted from that chair the phoenix killing him, no she couldn't tell him that he'd think her a monster and right now she needed Charles more than ever.;"I'm not from around here not even the same time frame, My mutation regenerates me and I guess this time when it was, when I was..." Her voice trailed off a broken sob breaking through her small frame before she found her voice again.;" When I was killed, it still wasn't enough and decided to place me here. Some where the power and I consider safe."Small fingers trailed lightly against his bed frame unsure of what else or how much she should say.;"I don't wish to scare you, but Charles I'm a monster and the only place that has ever meant a thing to me is this school." Holding back the and you she wanted to add to the sentence she shook her head more auburn curls falling loosely to her face.

Don't let it consume you. Don't let it consume you. Don't let it consume you. Don't let it consume you. Those words echoed over and over in her head drawing her back and forth between than and now before his presence brought her back. Giving a soft sigh she spoke again this time the crack in her voice was noticeable." This is why I say I can't leave Charles here, I can try to monitor myself and hopefully won't ruin the time line. Or I can see if my being here has any effect at all." She knew it to be quite a long shot but she could either try and look to the future her self or find a mutant who could do it for her.


	7. Chapter 7

"You'd be surprised, my dear." Charles listened to her story. His heart feeling a ping at her broken sobs and the emotion that she was carrying. The pain. He had the strong desire to wrap her in his arm and tell her that everything was going to be okay but he stopped himself. "I'm not going to push you to truly tell me about all of it." His voice was surprising gentle after the conversation, risking to let his hand cup her cheek, his thumb rubbing softly under her eyes. "And I will do whatever I can to help you. I won't make you leave. You are a guest for as long as you need." There was a faint smile that crossed his lips. "If it helps, I know how it feels to be lost and alone in this world. I came into my powers when I was merely nine, not really knowing what it was or what it could do." His voice seemed to trail off. "I threw my Mother into a wall by accident when she angered me one day." 

His hand fell and he rose from the floor to sit back on the bed. "You only affect the future if by some chance you change an event that holds something to do with history. It's doubtful that just your presence here with kill some balance in the universe." He didn't know if that made any sense but it sounded good. "Well, it is a pleasure to meet you, Miss. Jean Grey. Welcome to Xavier's school for gifted youngsters." He tried to make it come off sounding less dry then it did. Rising from the bed, he extended his hand to her. "Now, let's go get some dinner shall we.

At first, sitting around the table eating sandwiches seemed a little out of place but as the evening wore on, Charles began to smile again. Hank was actually over joyed because it was the first thing that he'd seen the man eat in weeks other then some crackers. Even Jean seemed to be loosening up a bit. "So the future." Hank looked at her like an excited little boy at Christmas. "What's it like?" He tried to control his tone. "Do I live past 30?" Charles chuckled and rolled his eyes. "She isn't a fortune teller, Hank." He threw a napkin across the table and hit him in the face.

~

She hadn't expected to get him into the dining room but when she did things in the air changed, Charles was smiling and Hank was laughing. This was more of what she knew, briefly she could forget about the demon locked inside her mind. She answered a few generic questions but nothing that would affect any of their future choices. It went on like this for hours until they all eventually retired, she moved to the room that would be hers in t he future. She had sleeping clothes on now a loose shirt and a pair of shorts but it was good enough for her. Even in the late hours she couldn't find the will to sleep, mind still racing on the nightmare she had come from. She never could have guessed that Logan would actually kill her, and yet she could not find the will to blame him not after what she had done to Charles.

Being unable to sleep she wondered how much had been added on during the years, she wasn't sneaking through the halls she was looking to see if the training grounds were underneath, but than again he may only have Cerebro. Green hues fell on the familiar doors much less security than in the future but she couldn't play with the device the one time she had might have been what cracked the walls Charles had built for the phoenix. Walking in the doors she saw no one just the smooth surface her fingers ran over the machine. Coated in dust much like everything else in the mansion, maybe she could clean it or at least try to.

The memories flooded her she'd been in this room the first day she arrived at the school, this was how the professor had said he found her. Seeing him and Magneto for the first time had came has quite a surprise she never thought there were others like her. Than again maybe there wasn't she was after all the only omega level one to exist, her own parents had only been to happy to be rid of her. A small tear rolled down her face body turning to head back to her room.


	8. Chapter 8

The dinner seemed to go off better then he had planned. He was actually enjoying being around other's for the moment. Laughing, joking. It was a breathe of fresh air and seemed to ignite something inside him. As the dinner wound down and they all seemed to go their separate ways, Charles seemed to have a lighter step as he walked. He didn't really know who this woman was but he was wanting to get to know her better. Hours had passed of nothing more then him staring at the ceiling, his mind racing, not wanting to slow down. He had managed to take a shower before getting ready for bed and that itself was a feet. 

He rose, grabbing his dressing robe and toeing into his slippers as he left his room, leaving the door ajar like he always did. It had been years since he'd walked down to the lower levels and for reasons he couldn't explain, that's where his feet where taking him. Younger Charles always held a curious nature for things. This Jean Grey wasn't going to be the exception now. He wasn't expecting to find anyone down in. Years of dust had rested on some surfaces and the others were just as shiny and new as when he and Erik had built this place. 

He wasn't at all shocked when the doors opened and Jean walked out. Well, maybe just a little but it was the sorrow on her face, the tear that sparkled on her cheek that made his heart skin into his stomach. "Talk to me." His voice soft as he walked toward her a little more. His hand rose to wipe the tear from her cheek with his thumb. "What monster are you fighting that you're so afraid of?" His blue eyes locked with green and stared into her soul. "Talk to me, Jean. You're in pain and I want to help." God, he could feel himself falling for this beautiful redhead and didn't know anything about her.

~

She hadn't expected to see him, the moment she did another wave of guilt rolled through her body. Her head turned away from his touch, the sadness clutching her voice like a vice grip;"I'm sorry Charles, I can't..I." The wave of guilt at her actions in the future hurt her more than she could ever speak. With that she turned to walk back to her room;"I'm sorry I know you don't like people down here, I'll be in my room." She didn't want to hurt him but what was she to say, not only had she killed Scott and god knows how many humans and mutants, but the one thing that seemed beyond her forgiving her self was the death of Charles. With the loss of his hand she almost cringed it was reassuring and warm, it felt like safety something she would always crave for she would never be safe from her self.

Sure she had hurt his feelings she refused to come out of her room the next day, she wondered if she had sent him back drinking only to shake her head. No he doesn't know me, at least not that well. Why would he care what I do? She seemed to wrestle with questions all day even refusing Hank's food in the nicest way she could manage. Perhaps the best thing for her to do was find a way to either control her powers or a way to truly kill her self. Charles wouldn't approve of these thoughts, giving up hope but at times like this it was only a matter of time before hope gave way and the flood gates to either her depression or the phoenix would open. Sitting in bed knees curled to her chest she felt tired of wrestling her own mind, and part of her wished Logan had won. With all the damage she caused she didn't deserve life, how could she.

It seems Charles wouldn't be paying her a visit today the only one who knocked was Hank, and the concern in his voice only drove her further into her mind. She could hear the whispering of The Phoenix deep in her mind almost like a lure a deep lullaby singing her favorite tune. Part of her wondered if any one else could hear how this creature talks to her, telling her to accept defeat to give in. She was always a monster, with the way she felt it was hard to keep the shield up it was only when the voices went quiet that she found in amount of relief.;"Help me." Voice raspy front not speaking at all she hated her self this loneliness she was no longer the bright person she should be.


	9. Chapter 9

As his hand fell and she walked away, he felt his heart drop even more. How was is going to help her if she wouldn't even let him in? Sighing in defeat, he looked into Cerebro as the doors slowly closed. He knew what he had to do and he lowered his head, hands clenched to his fist at his sides. He left her alone. Hank giving him words here and there about how she was doing. Not eating, Jean didn't even come out of her room. On the second day, he could feel the serum wearing off. His legs feeling weak as he laid against the headboard of his bed and the voices, oh god the voices slowly started to filter back into his mind and then... then the pain. Millions of people screaming in his mind as he dug the heels of his hands into his temples and tried to control his breathing. An Omega level mutant wasn't suppose to feel this weak against his powers and their was one time, he was in complete control. 

"Control it." The words were spoken through clenched teeth. His legs seemed to be burning from use as the muscles began to contract. And then... then he heard it. It was so soft that he almost missed it but it was Jean. A tiny little voice inside her own mind that was asking for help. God, it made him want to break down even more. "Jean." He closed his eyes and focused on her and her alone, laying in her bed beyond the kitchen. Charles voice would echo in her mind but he wouldn't push it. He'd only look if she'd allow it, for now he was merely talking but she would be able to pick up the pain in his own. 

"Control whatever is causing you pain, Jean. Don't let it consume you." He breathed, a tad bit labored. His shaking fingers pressed to his temple as he groaned. "You have to trust me. I can help you if you let me..." His voice was suddenly cut out as he suppressed a cry. Another mutant's voice in his head screaming for their own pain to stop. "Let... me... help... you. Please." Charles was on the brink of tears before the connection was lost on his end and he turned to his side, screaming into his pillow at the voices in his head. He really wasn't any use to anyone like this and it killed him. He didn't use to be this way. One arm around his head, buried into the pillow as the other was clenched tightly on the edge of the bed. Knuckles white as his nails dug into the mattress.

~

The voices seemed to go back and forth in her mind dancing around and taunting her. It wasn't like this last time the phoenix had merely broken through but this time she was playing with Jean. Making her wish for death, and than she felt it his powers on the fringe of her mind. " Charles?" Her voice was spoken out loud said softly but she knew he couldn't hear her. The voice had came from inside her mind and the shields hiding the phoenix story away seemed to drop the slightest bit. He sounded like the man she knew the one who was her greatest comfort. The pain in her chest started over again how could she be so stupid how could she let her powers control her. She was a monster who deserved death, and that was what Charles would receive from her. Her own voice wishing death upon herself, she was so close to the edge and the minute those words tinged her mind everything came racing back shielding her from him. A sob shaking cracking through her body with force enough that it would echo upstairs.

She hadn't been able to focus the entire night her body confined to one little space on the bed her mind fading to the abyss. It wasn't until dawn did the tears stop rather that be because she couldn't cry any more or because she had willed her self to stop was unknown. Slowly she moved from the comforter hair no longer held up was in disarray framing her face the shirt some how now hung off her slender shoulder. Softly walking into the kitchen she didn't see Hank anywhere nor smell food cooked, she hoped she hadn't been to harsh. Noticing a small note attached to the fridge she read it. He had headed out for a supply run, apparently he needed more things for his lab.

A little while later she was still in the kitchen fixing a small breakfast of eggs, bacon, and coffee. She hadn't heard a peep from Charles and she had to know if he was okay. Placing a plate and cup on the tray she moved quietly up the stairs not recalling to fix her hair or how the clothes clung to her frame. A soft rap against the door. "Charles, can I come in?" Her voice was still tinged with sadness not even sure if he would wish to see her.


	10. Chapter 10

He'd lost track of time. In every form. Not moving from the spot that his body had come to rest in. He'd heard that sob that escaped Jean through the floor and it only made him sob himself more. He couldn't help her anymore then he tried. His body already feeling weakened from it. He couldn't even raise his head from the pillow. Not that he wanted too. Maybe he would smother himself with it and be done. He didn't even smell the food that morning, didn't hear Hank tell him he was leaving. He just wasn't up for caring. 

He couldn't even raise his head as he heard Jean at the door. "Go away." His voice raw from the emotions of the night but somehow, he knew that she would come in anyway. His nose picking up the food on the tray and his stomach growled but he paid it no mind. In the foggy haze that was his mind, there didn't seem to be many voices lurking around, didn't seem to be much pain. At some point during his connect with her last night, before the shield managed to go back up, he caught a glimpse of something that made him think. And through the haze, it was all too clear. She was his death angel. Well, she couldn't have picked a better time. 

"Please." His voice sounded so weak as he spoke. He didn't want anyone to see him like this. This broken shell. Red rimmed eyes and swollen face. He really didn't know if he was begging for her to go away, really or if he needed some form of comfort. For both their sakes. Hands once again dug into his temples as he pressed a scream into the pillow. "Ah! Make them go away!" Another scream, not being able to move from his spot on the bed. Bloody legs not wanting to bloody work. He wished above all hope that he could get his old self back, before the bullet, before Erik came into his life but he knew that wasn't going to happen and he was lost. Lost in the world of pain that the serum had help him hide for so long.

~

The words were faint and raw but she heard them all the same, it didn't take away the sting. She refused to listen though pushing the door open softly, the smell of booze was faint as if he hadn't had a drop in a few days. That alone was almost enough to make her smile, right up to the point her soft hues filled care and concern laid on him. He was unable to walk that much she could tell, this must be why Hank was out. Moving with ease she placed the food on his night stand and stepped into the light still somehow only coming from the door way. Carefully she rested on the edge of the bed her voice soft as she spoke;" I know you won't ask for my help Charles but I'm going to give it regardless." This was how she felt strong standing by those she cared for. Slender fingers moved with ease trailing up his arms before an index finger rested on each temple. "Focus on me Charles, You were always my strength so let me be yours" Her voice seemed to plead with him and she hoped he would listen.

Her power even in her broken state of mind was powerful and what she was trying to do with it was create a temporary shield or block to at least lessen the flow of voices for her dearest friend. He was resisting that much she could feel from him. " Please Charles why must you fight me?" She asked for an answer she would never receive. She wondered how often he ran out of the serum or if this was Hank's way of trying to make Charles fix him self, but how could he much more than his body and mind were broken it was his heart. Slowly her left hand traced against his hair pushing it back before a soft cup to his cheek and finally she ghosted against his skin till she could rest her palm in the middle of his chest. No she had no power to manipulate this into feeling better but she could work well enough to soothe him. " Hush darling I have you" She'd always been the type to use pet names and this was no different.

Palm soft against his chest when the worst of the pain seemed to subside she moved well enough that she could rest his head upon her thighs. Her hands were softly working through messy hair taking the human approach of calming him. "Can you forgive me Charles" A small sob seemed to latch onto the edge of her words. She hadn't meant to hurt him, to send him to this state. She would never wish any harm upon Charles. "What did you see?" Her voice still held that echo of sadness wanting to know if he knew her dark secret.


	11. Chapter 11

"Please." He actually was quietly begging for her help, knowing that only other telepath could make this pain go away. Not being able to control the trembling as he felt her fingers trailing up his arm before pressing softly against his temple. "Please." It was softer this time, his voice still raw. He nodded softly, letting his mind and his body do nothing more then focus on her. Fighting her mind wasn't what he was trying to do. He'd put up a block several years ago to keep other telepaths from entering his mind. Eyes closed, he slowly started to control his breathing. "Not... trying... to.... Promise." It was spoken through clenched teeth and the pain was clearly written across his face. 

He was slowly starting to grow more relaxed with her touches, leaning into the skin on skin contact as if it were something that his body craved and he'd been denying it for far too long. His hurt seemed to skip a beat when she called him "Darling" and it caused a slight sob to escape his lips. The voices and the pain were slowly starting to eb away back into the dark abyss from where they once came. He'd never felt so at peace. He leaned into the touch. Though slender fingers she hand running through his mess of hair and he couldn't help but sigh. She'd done it, he'd let her in enough to where all the voices had calmed and the pain was slowly going away and the sigh of relief came from his whole body. 

The sob at the edge of her words didn't go unnoticed. Turning the best he could so that he could stare into those green hues that seemed to captivate him so. "I saw my older self. I saw you. I wasn't in pain but I wasn't strong enough to stop what was happening." His tone didn't hold hate or malice to it. He was oddly calm. "You were surrounded by the most beautiful flames I've ever saw but I wasn't in control of my body. That bloody chair." His voice was a chuckled sob. "I saw my death." He rose his hand to cup her face. "And I forgive you." His tone serious the minute the words escaped his lips. "Now, you are fighting with yourself. Fighting with your demons. I'm a broken man, Jean but you don't have to face them alone. Let me help you. Please."

~

Her face showed it all, she knew the answer before he spoke. He knew the monster that she was and just has he had in the future he was accepting her. How she had been since she was ten years old and how she would always be. Most of the time hope of calming her demons of controlling them were fleeting and non-existent. The way he caught her gaze offered hope though and some how even though she still couldn't forgive herself his forgiveness made the pain easier to bare. Pale hands stilled in his hair as she felt him cup her cheek, much against her notice or control a soft flush of heat crossed where his hand lay. She only became distracted by his plea to help her. " When you first came to me you set up blocks in my mind to contain her." She spoke with such distaste when the thought of phoenix was dredged up. She would submit though her head falling against his hand those loose tangled curls falling against him she let her mind eb blank.

They sat that way in silence before some time passed she knew until he was able to control his powers again he wouldn't be able to set the blocks back, but perhaps just being near him could keep them at bay. Most would feel odd at the closeness they were sharing but feeling awkward was never in the cards for Jean in fact she hadn't felt this calm in years. The demon that had been causing her thoughts of death now stilled in her mind even has the reel of memory that was his death played through her. He had never showed fear or anger in that moment all he had shown was concern like he always had. Don't let it consume you and perhaps she hadn't perhaps in letting Logan cut into her soft flesh she had earned some form of control. Without even noticing her hand was once more playing with his hair.


	12. Chapter 12

Charles nodded, listening with interest at her words. His hand keeping still on her cheek and then. The soft curls that touched him and he wondered what it would be like to run his hairs through her hair. To sooth her the way she was soothing him but it was the silence between them. It was quiet pleasant. Just breathing in her scent, everything that was Jean Grey and god how he wished to know what those lips would feel like on his own. 

"So when I came to you." His voice was gentle, reflecting the man that he once was. "When you were young, I already knew that you were an Omega level mutant with an rare gift." Sounding more curious as the thoughts poured from his mouth. "Was I old then?" He arched a brow as he pondered whether or not this was a good question and then he shook his head. "Bloody hell, when do I loose my hair?" Saying this, he leaned into her touch more, sighing with content as she played with his mess of brown locks. 

"Jean." His voice once again taking on the tone of concern. "I need you to open up to me. I know you have fears and worries and I understand that you want nothing more then to hide away. But you can't let those demons control you. If you do, your going to end up like me. A bloody mess and I'm sure you don't want that." His thumb was making soft circles around her cheekbone, trying to give her the strength to open up. "I'm the same person you knew, just in a younger form. And I will do everything in my power to help you over come yours if you help me over come mine."

~

She heard his voice and thought for a moment, well he had been old but than again she had been but ten years old everyone over sixteen was old to her. Giving a soft chuckle she felt a lightness to her chest that she hadn't felt in such a very long time. Her face was still resting against his palm eyes tracing every inch of his face. He was so much scruffier than she had imagined , her voice was still soft " Well I don't really know your exact age you had a funny way of telling us your birthday but never the year" Her nose wiggled to the side like she was a child thinking. "And you would never tell any student when you went all shiny head"; She gave a playful laugh moving his hair to make a point.

Her name followed by the tone of concern filled her with a small amount of dread once more. Her voice soft as she listened to him. She felt his thumb against her cheek bone and some how this small action was the most relaxing thing she'd ever felt. She'd had thoughts of Charles as more than friend before but she never acted on it. He was right though he was the same Charles just younger, her green hues traced against his face seeming trances against his eyes. The soft beat of her heart picking up in pace she almost felt her self leaning in. The smell of Charles feeling her nose right until she jumped a knocking on the door.

After she had disentangled her self from Charles she moved to open the door, Hank was there and needed to speak to Charles. Giving a nod she shifted on the heels of her feet " Eat please Charles" Her face was soft with a light smile has she slipped outta the room leaving the two men to talk. God she'd almost no she shook her head moving down the stairs. She distracted her self by cleaning the mess in the kitchen before retreating to clean the mess that was her self. Looking in the heavy floor length mirror she almost felt a girlish since of shame she was a wreck, she discarded the clothes and moved to the shower and let everything be washed away including the girlish shame.

It was a few hours later before she found her self out of the room and it had taken her forever to understand the fashion of seventies, it was actually quite terrifying eventually she settled on wearing a pair of high wasted shorts, pair of socks, and a baggy shirt that seemed to only cling to one spot on her body. She'd really have to go shopping for herself, it's not like she needed to be seen out of the house that often. Giving a sigh she walked into the kitchen slowly brushing pale fingers though her auburn hair.


	13. Chapter 13

He chuckled. "Well, I always have this rule. I'm old enough to know what I can and can't do but still to young not to give a bloody damn." Leaning into her touch once again. It had really been far to long since he just enjoyed the company of a woman. Not expecting anything other then soft touches, peaceful conversation and dare he think, maybe love. He could feel her eyes all over his face and he couldn't help but smile. This strange woman was indeed beautiful. Hank always had a way of ruining a moment and he couldn't help the small whine escape him that only she would be able to her. He nodded as she told him to eat and he would. Watching as Jean disappeared out the door. 

Hank helped him from his bed to the chair, the smell of the food making his stomach growl and he ate as he extended his arm. "I need to walk, need to think and I know that's where you went this morning." Charles arched a brow as he spoke. Hank getting him ready to inject his with his serum. Hissing and eating a piece of bacon at the same time as the needle was stuck into his skin. "So are you going to help her?" Hank asked as the needle was removed and tossed aside. Coffee cup resting on Charles bottom lip. "I'm going to try." When he thought about something and wanted it, it wasn't far from his mind to do so. 

He rose, thanking Hank and disappearing into his bathroom. Shaving was more of an issues then he thought. Not taking all the scruff away but trimming it down. Taking a shower, leaning his forehead against the wall as his mind was lost in thought. God, it wouldn't take much to get lost in his mind and let a hand wonder to do something he's not did in ages but he didn't. Shaking his head and turning on the cold water before turning it off, wrapping a towel around his waist and stepping out. His hand wiped the steam from the mirror and he started at it for the longest time, his reflection didn't look like his own. Oh well. He'd get better. He always did. It just might take some time to put the pieces of this broken man back together and he had a feeling that Jean could do it. 

He was still trying to get his buck snapped in place as he walked into the kitchen, stalling when he saw her run through slender fingers through her auburn hair. God, if she only knew. The clicks of his shoes walking over to the stove, putting the kettle on and leaning against the counter. "We need to go shopping." His tone seemed nonchalant as he reached for a cup and a tea bag. "I don't believe that the clothes left here are going to be a good look for you. Mine you, I'm sure the fashions in the future are nothing like they are here. We seem to have a thing for." He paused. "Flowers and peace and all that other fun stuff." He couldn't help himself as a strand of her hair fell against her face and he moved to place it back behind her ear. "Then again, I could see you with a crown of daisies around your hair." And he was lost in a sea of green as he stared into her eyes, only snapped back into the moment by a whistling kettle. "I only took half a dose." He poured the hot water into the cup. "Hank was testing it last night. It's strong enough that I can keep my powers without having to loose everything else. It just wears off faster."

~

She noticed almost right off that he had shaved, why his hair even looked tucked back and trimmed. She saw the tea kettle on the boil and could almost moan in delight. It had been quite some time since she had enjoyed a well brewed cup of tea. Arching her brow she gave playful huff now faintly aware of how odd these clothes must look against her skin. She'd always been the type to wear her uniform more than anything other thing but she highly doubted it was made just yet. Her eyes were still roaming her body when he put a hand against her face. A small trace of pink graced her pale skin and she seemed to stutter for a moment. She was once more aware of the hammering to her chest when she heard Hank's cough behind her, doing her best to act normal she gave a smile and turned away as he moved to the kettle. "Morning Hank, um evening " She shrugged still a small smile on her lips "Charles was talking about shopping, but I may be a bit scared at his choice of shops" She leaned in pretending to whisper about Charles paisley shirts.

Some time had passed and she had spent it talking with Hank trying to understand how his serum worked, drinking a small cup of tea. She wanted to understand the serum hoping with her knowledge of the future sciences if she could perhaps improve it. Though this was something she probably shouldn't do, and yet every time she had this thought her eyes drifted to Charles and she seemed reaffirmed in helping. Even though Jean wasn't much of a scientist more of a doctor. She'd patched up countless mutants who would wander in lost, broken, and damaged. Her friends she felt a sudden pang of home sickness, giving Hank a small hug she decided to go to her room.

The room was much has it was in the future but it had none of Jean's belongings, nothing that made it hers. She gave a soft sigh moving to sat on the bed, her legs crossed and she began to focus she wasn't trying to play with her powers just relax and let her mind go blank. During this she knew random snippets of peoples thoughts would drift to her. She could stay like this for hours normally but some how she found her mind drifting back to the man who had pulled her from despair once and was trying to do it again. Why she was so quiet she had no idea perhaps she should move, go talk to him.

She had wrestled with the idea for sometime before moving off the bed her feet always quiet against the floor. Opening the heavy oak door she looked in the halls it always seemed so quiet with no students around, and at this point she had no idea where Charles might be.


	14. Chapter 14

Sliding her a cup of tea, he smiled. Smiling even wilder as she leaned into him and made fun of his clothes. He was able to catch a whiff of that wonderful shampoo that she used. The conversation seemed light an airy and he couldn't help but catch the little glances that he gave her during the conversation because to be quite honest, he was doing the same thing. Being from the future or not, regardless of what she had done in her past, Jean was a beautiful woman, there was absolutely no denying that. As she rose, giving Hank a hug, she departed to her room. Hank and Charles spent a few more minutes talking about nonsense before they to departed ways.

He had spent hours in his room after that, going over things in his head. Hank buried deep in his lab and Jean, probably sitting in her room and merely trying to collect his thoughts. He was mostly trying to figure out a solution to her problem, how to contain something that she called her "Monster." He'd never met another telepath that matched his own strength level if not higher and it utter fascinated him. A hand racked over his face and he leaned the chair back, head pressed against the back as he stared at the clock, it was going to be a long night it seemed. Thanks to only taking a half dose of the serum, Charles was still able to hear the voices but it wasn't causing him as much pain as not having it. Maybe with this and a little help, he'd be able to get back on his feet. 

Closing his eyes, his mind seemed to drift. Not on voices but on the beautiful redhead that was downstairs. He inhaled sharply as his thoughts drifted to what it would be like to truly run his fingers through her hair, to kiss her lips. To just touch her skin. He felt that odd stirring in his loins and could feel himself start to get aroused just by the thought of her. Hands clenching the arms of the chair as his mind raced with what it would be like to touch her, everywhere; licking and sucking and dear god, being buried deep inside her. He felt the strain that his now rock hard cock was placing on his trouser and he licked his lips. Not being able to control it anymore. 

The zipper echoes a little louder in the silence then he wanted and he shivered as his cock hit the cool air in the room. Not sparing a minute as his hand wrapped around the base and started to pump up the shaft. What was he doing? A moan broke his parted his and he was lost to his lust. Thoughts of Jean on top of him, riding him in this very chair. This wouldn't take long considering he'd not had a woman in years and sexual pleasure seemed to be the furthest thing from his mind. Using the pre-cum leaking from his slit to coat his hand, Charles pumped himself harder. "Oh Jean." It was quite when it came from his lips. He didn't know if his mind was projecting what he was doing and he really didn't care. The eb in his stomach growing closer, the burning becoming too much and with a loud groan, Charles seed shot into his hand and he was left a writhing mess in his chair. Heavy breathing and a thin sheet of sweat on his brow. Grabbing one of his shirts off the floor, he began to clean himself up, tucking his growing soft cock back into his pants. Well, that was certainly different.

Feet soft she scanned the kitchen before deciding to ascend the stairs she was sure Charles wasn't asleep not yet the night was still early, and the thought hit her has she felt his voice at the edge of her mind she was still to relaxed her shield down. A slow pace she felt one thought enter her mind and yet she had no idea where it had come from, was it her own or was Charles? The thought right their made her flash red has her name rang against Jean's ears. For a moment she thought she should turn around just go back to her room forget the night, braving the latter her hands softly rapped against his door voice soft has she opened. " Charles?" 

She had not meant to intrude but from the quick tuck to his pants to how breathless he looked, she took a few moments to piece together what happened. A quiet oh slipped from her lips before she turned heel to face away and give him a few moments to straighten himself. Though she thought she knew what he had done she didn't voice her opinion she'd never had an encounter of this sort . " I hadn't meant to intrude, I couldn't sleep" Voice soft she wondered if she should leave and just push the images from her mind, a brief moment if the flash from earlier had been him.

Awkward moments of silence had passed before she turned around, " I just wished to talk to you some more." After all talking to Charles had always eased her mind in the future not that she was to terribly troubled at the moment. If anything could be said about her mood she was calm almost peaceful. Her green hues narrowing to travel against his skin seeing a lightly un-tucked shirt and that his breath was still a tad hitched.


	15. Chapter 15

Awkward wasn't the word that he would use, seeing the object of his recent lust come walking through his bedroom door as he was making himself once again presentable. "You're quite alright. I..." He wasn't going to lie and say that he wasn't at a loss for words. "I couldn't really sleep either. Little growing problem that wouldn't go away." He rose from his chair, finishing fixing his clothes. "Please, come in." His voice was calm, trying to get a better hold of himself after what he had just did. "Um..." He moved toward the small sofa that was in his room, gathering the clutter from it and placing it on the desk, making it even more cluttered then it already was.

"What was on your mind?" He rose his hand and extended it toward the small soft where he himself took a seat, crossing his legs and waiting for her too sit. "I'm always here. I don't want you to think that I'm some trash king, crazy loner that wanks off to house guests in his bedroom." His tone was light as he spoke, but there was a hint of shame behind it. He couldn't believe that he'd almost been caught in the act, let alone by the object of his affection at the moment. True she was from the future and true that he didn't know a lot about her but Charles wanted to. 

It was the way she acted; her smile, her perfume, just everything about her that had captured his attention. She was a mystery to him and he sorta loved it. Her eyes, that crown of auburn hair. Jean Grey was a woman that he wanted to know. Wanted to be closer too. He might have been in his older years but things had changed now. Still the same man that she knew but not as seasoned. Waiting for her to take a seat beside him and open up about whatever it was she needed to say, his smile warm and welcoming and hoping against hope that she wouldn't use what just transpired against him.

~

She knew Charles in his older years, and even though many of the qualities were the same she couldn't help but notice the way he moved, the way his gaze would travel against her skin and honestly the mere thought made her flush. Slowly she moved closing the door behind her and even this late at night she moved with a grace taking a seat next to him. Though part of her wanted to question what he'd been doing she knew the look he was giving her. Those wonderful blue hues against her own green he wished for her to do, wanted her to speak whatever was on her mind. A small hand moved to rest against his own." I can talk now Charles" She paused for a moment keeping his hand between hers and the memories would began flashing. She wouldn't show him the future but she could show what caused her fears.

The memory started with an eight year old girl showing such empathy it was amazing no one could pick up she was more than just concerned. Drifting from that to her mother's pill addiction and her fathers lack of caring but there was a golden fringe drifting has memories of her elder sister began to wrap around his mind. Slowly everything turned dark, Jean had felt her sisters death and the darkness it had left behind. More years went by showing the broken little girl who refused to trust a soul and eventually was abandoned at an asylum until Charles found her. He had discovered the alter ego The Phoenix and blocked Jean from accessing the monster, her monster.

As she pulled her hands lightly away from Charles she hesitated wishing beyond everything to have that feeling her sister had given her. Those brief moments of peace where the world wasn't so overwhelming, a small tear trailed against her face has she locked eyes once more. Her green hues normally bright with love, now dim but passionate about remembering what once was.


	16. Chapter 16

He couldn't help the urge to lace their fingers together, her hand warm against his own. Charles wasn't afraid, relaxing his mind for whatever she wished to talk to him about and the memories hit him like a brick wall. All the pain and sadness, the good times and the bad. The past, present. She wouldn't show him anything in the future but the feeling of sadness was there. Coming in waves into his mind and he felt like his heart was going to explode. Tears pooling in those blue hues and he couldn't stop them from rolling down his cheeks. Such a beautiful person to have so much inflicted on her. 

He didn't come back to reality until he felt Jean's hand pull away. Reaching out so that it was once again clasped with his own, his eyes and head rose to meet with hers and he was once again blown away with the emotion and the sheer passion that shown through those dim green hues. Charles couldn't help feel a small amount of pity for her, for everything that she had been through. No, not pity. He felt love, love for this woman that he had no Earthy clue who she was or where she really came from but he wanted to get to know her better. 

"Jean." His voice was soft as he rose his hand to cup her cheek. "Thank you." He didn't know is he should risk it not but Charles slowly leaned forward, giving her the chance to pull away if she wanted too. If she didn't pull away, his lips would meet her own and dear god, they were soft. His hand moving to tangle in her auburn hair. Leaning the both of them back against the couch, his mind reaching out to her as he kissed her. 'I'll help you in any way that I can.' She was soft, god so soft and he could see himself falling in love with her, giving her everything that she needed. Everything that she wanted. The kiss broken after a moment as he pulled back, a little ashamed of himself. "I'm sorry." He started to move from the sofa.

~

She hadn't expected such softness from Charles, surely he was a kind man but the tone in his voice was enough to break her heart. She caught the glimpse in his mind the want to lean forward, she knew before he even tried what he wished. Nothing pulled her away though her body all but leaned into him, those lips were softer than she had expected. Even though trimmed she could feel the slight tickle of his facial hair, her small frame moving willingly under his. Not being able to place why or how, but everything about this felt right. Her body formed so well against his, the way his fingers ran through her hair she couldn't help the moan that escaped her lips. The flush that crept her cheeks was amazingly bright, she'd always felt something for Charles but never thought of it this way until now.

Has he pulled away she wanted to whine in protest pull those wonderful lips back against hers. The hammering in her chest wouldn't cease oh god what was she to do, she wasn't drawn from her thoughts until he said sorry. Her face became puzzled has she listened to him say sorry, her hand was quicker than she had meant it to be pulling him back to the couch. She had known Charles for a life time, and never figured out why she felt so drawn to him. He barely knew her though at least in this point in time, and could she even fall in love with him at this moment. Her mind began to race in time with her heart. What could she do ?

"Charles, please?" The concern was written there, letting him know just what was going through her mind. What could she do, she couldn't risk changing the future but god she wanted to. Her mind flashing to when she had first walked into the room seeing him such a state. She needed his wisdom to tell her she could do this, she could be with him and not just because they wanted to.


	17. Chapter 17

He could hear the concern that laced her voice and a small smile crossed his lips. "I don't know what is it about you but I'm pulled to you." He took her hand in his own, lacing their fingers together as he brought it too his lips with an even wider smile then before. "I want to help you, Jean. To get to know you and if anything between us happens, we let it. I've had several women that I liked slipped through my fingers before and I'm tired of being alone." There was a small ping of pain to his voice as he said those five little words. 

"And if you're wondering as to whether or not this will effect the future, I don't believe that it will, at least not as bad as you believe. You're already gone." He didn't say it to be mean, Charles had said it to drive home a point, hoping that she wouldn't take it the wrong way. "I share the same fears as you and I believe that with each other's help, everything can be fixed. Can you help me hope again?" 

His eyes seemed lost in her own with the words, searching for anything that she might be able to give him. A spark, anything that might suggest that not all hope was lost, regardless of how he felt at the moment. "I'll even trim myself up a bit." He couldn't help how playful it came out as he rubbed his lips across her knuckles. "I like you, Jean probably a little more then I should. You have a kind heart. One that I've not seen in quite sometime."

~

She couldn't help but smile against the slight tease, her hand softly leaving his she moved to trail against the fluff. " Oh Charles I know I like you more than I should." There was a spark insider those green hues that said she thought more on the subject than she was saying. Her eyes drifted to the side her voice soft. "I just do not wish to destroy anything further." Her hand cupped against his cheek, she leaned forward wanting to feel the softness of his lips against hers. No she wasn't sure if they should, much less was she sure of how much she could control. She had always cared for Charles, there had been so many nights where she had come to him for comfort, solace, and advice and maybe she'd fallen in love with him a long time ago. Maybe just spending time with him when she already knew so much drew her in further, she couldn't know for sure but she knew she enjoyed the way his lips reacted on hers.

She withdrew slowly from being so near to him, this was all so new she didn't wish to overwhelm them in one night. " I know you'll ask me to stay Charles, but this can't go to fast." She moved from the couch with ease pressing her lips to his forehead in a feather soft kiss. " I'm going to go to my room for the night perhaps we can have coffee in the morning?" She moved slowly from the room to her own, and at the time her mind was over thinking. Could she be with a man she had known since she was fourteen? Even though she said the question she knew the answer all to well, she wanted to be with him. The thought of those hands close on her skin, in her hair, god it was almost to much to think of. Biting her lower lip she was almost to her room when Hank caught her. He spoke softly ;"I won't say you aren't good for him, honestly if you hadn't shown up he might have wasted to nothing. I know you care for him as well, but Jean tread lightly. While Charles is an amazing man he is broken and has many dangerous enemies. Keep this in mind I don't wish to warn you away in fact something tells me this will only drive you closer to his side, I simply wish for you both to be cautious." With that Hank released her, her mind a much more confused place he had been right, what Hank had said only made her wish to be closer. Losing her mind once more to the memories of his lips on hers she drifted to sleep.

The next morning Jean found her self awake almost at the crack of dawn, moving with grace she left her bed shredding her clothes she moved into the bathroom. Moments later she emerged pale skin turned pink from heat and towel wrapped tightly around her slender frame, thumbing through her clothes, she found a dress, she thought most would call it a sundress. While it wasn't fancy it was green and straps were tied to hold it up, sh could never thank Charles enough for the clothes. Slipping on some sandals she left her room pulling her tight in a ponytail, has she came to the kitchen breakfast smells hit her nose and she couldn't help but wonder who had cooked.


	18. Chapter 18

He tilted his head at her remark, rather curious at what she meant but he wasn't going to press the issue, just having her around was a distracted enough for him. Leaning into the hand that cupped his cheek, he couldn't help but give a smile small at her words. "You won't destroy much. I can promise you that. You're hear now. That's what matters." He could feel his heart racing as she began to lean toward him and it was the most wonderful feeling in the world. He couldn't help but melt into the kiss; her lips soft and sweet. He didn't risk wrapping his arms around her and pulling her close but his mind for the most part had went blissfully blank from just a kiss. 

He felt the cold as she withdrew from him and had to swallow down the whine that wised to follow. He'd never been so attached to someone so quickly and he couldn't help but wonder why. And dear god yes, he would ask her to stay with him in a heartbeat. To feel, remember what it was like to fall asleep with a warm body in his arms and to wake with the same. There was a sadness he tried to hide in his eyes as she kissed his forehead and pulled away. "Coffee sounds wonderful." He finally found his voice and smiled at her, watching as she left his room and shut the door. God, why did he feel like a teenager with a crush all of a sudden. His mind racing as he rose from the couch and literally spun around the room. It was almost as if he had something to live for now. Something that might fix the broken and he couldn't wipe the smile off his face. It gave him enough motivation to shuffle the blankets from his bed and cough with the dust that floated off them. "This room is a bloody mess." Instead of sleep, Charles spent have the night cleaning and even he was amazed with all the bottles that he removed. Three bags of trash by the door later and a hot shower, and he finally started to look like the man that he use to be. Falling into his bed, letting his mind wonder for a brief moment with just Jean's name on his lips, Charles fell asleep. 

All he remembered was waking before the sun rose, actually jumping from the bed with a smile across his lips. Seventies clothes, ugh. He picked out something that he felt didn't make him look stupid and grinned. Looking in the mirror shocked him a bit. The trash lord look slowly disappearing and Charles was starting to look like he use too. Leaving his room and heading to the kitchen, raiding the fridge and making breakfast just seemed like the right thing too do. The smells started to filter through the kitchen as the dishes where one by one set on the table. "My Mother taught me to cook a long time ago." His voice soft with a smile. "I've just not did it in a very long time."

~

Hearing his voice she hadn't expected the sight she saw, Charles looked trimmed once more. The trash lord has Hank had taken to calling him, mostly when he wasn't around. She gave a small laugh to herself moving to his view. " Good morning Charles, did you sleep well?" Her voice was soft and still tinged with a small amount of sleep. Her green hues left him for a moment to scan the room, didn't seem like Hank was making an appearance today. He of course would most likely be working on the serum, part of her wondered what had made Charles decide it wasn't worth it any more in the future. Shaking her hand, her eyes returned to him "Well some one is looking rather dapper." Her voice was soft and teasing, she edged her self closer leaning up to reach for a coffee mug. Because honestly the smell was driving her crazy, slender fingers finally grasping two mugs she poured them each a cup of coffee. She couldn't recall the last time she had such fun.

About two months had passed since that breakfast, and things between Charles and she had seemed to take a rather odd tone. By this she meant they would be hot and cold and the temperature always varied by person. There were days where Charles was back to the man she had first encountered when she arrived here, that man would send her running to her room and refusing to speak to either man in the house. She had never known Charles has a junkie, but this serum was, he would try to only take half doses but this didn't always last . The worst had come when an old friend has he had called her arrived on their doorstep, a girl with tan skin and blonde hair. Honestly Jean found herself lost, right until she saw this female react with Charles, she couldn't help but feel lost even Hank paid her no mind. There came a point where both men were busy and the female came to talk to Jean. " So Charles, and you are?" The tone in her voice seemed to disgust at the thought of Jean and Charles being anything. Jean simply gave a smile " He's given me a home." This seemed to give her reason for more of a snarky remark, but if there was one she kept her mouth shut moving back to the two males. They'd called her Raven and for some reason this name sounded oddly familiar, but Jean just couldn't place it. She hated to see the way Charles tensed every time she came close, what was this woman to him and why did it set rage off inside of Jean.

It was a day after this woman had once again left that she found Charles in his room bottle of scotch in hand, her face seemed to fall." Charles I thought you weren't going to do this any more?" She didn't hear an answer and a deep sigh left her red lips." Do you love her?" She seemed a little fallen at this note. Sure Charles and her had fought a few more times than she would like, but she was merely trying to help him, and yet she wondered if she thought she simply wished him to change. Even Hank had avoided her since that day, leaving her merely feeling lost, he still refused to answer her and this stung. This wasn't the Charles she knew and that thought practically screamed in her head, her shields had fallen. This would not end well she could already feel her temper raising at his refusal to acknowledge her.


	19. Chapter 19

"I slept." He gave a soft smile, inhaling her scent while she was close to him. Hank wouldn't be joining them this morning, busy in his lab doing god knows what. Probably pinning away with love loss. God, she reached over to get a coffee mug and he was lost to his thoughts. Thank god his shield was up this morning or Jean would know exactly what he wished to do to her. "Dapper. Haven't been called that in some time." Taking the coffee with a smile as he took a small sip. The morning was filled with laughter, talking and everything that was right with the world. Charles hadn't smiled this much in a long time and it made his heart want to burst. He yearned to know this woman better. She just made everything feel right. 

As the months past, something happened that he couldn't explain. They were getting closer to one another. Jean was slowly helping him wean himself off the serum. Hank seemed to be pleased and the broken pieces where finally starting to come together once again. Jean seemed to be the glue that was holding him once again. There had been a few small fights between them but nothing that didn't get resolved but there was something else. As much as he adored Jean, she kept comparing him to his older self. He wasn't that person yet, he was just Charles. Keeping his mind shielded whenever she would bring it up was the only way to stop himself from saying or thinking something that would hurt her feelings and he didn't want that. Then the bomb fell back on their doorstep. Raven. 

He didn't mean to ignore Jean while she was here. Didn't mean to push her away the way he did. It hurt him to think that the woman he was starting to fall in love with felt out of place in anyway. He didn't recall the rather blunt conversation that the two women had had and he didn't even know when he had fallen back into the bottle. Raven was like a sister to him but he did love her. Just not in the way that he thought. He cared for her, had known her since they were children. He'd been stolen away from him and now she was back and he didn't know what to do or think. The serum being jacked back up to full strength and he'd stopped grooming himself again. Bottles, empty and lining the floor of his bedroom. The day Raven left, he locked himself always in his room. Not daring to talk or be seen by anyone. 

He looked down at the bottle in his hand... he didn't want this. Did he? He heard every word that Jean was asking him but the will to want to answer just wasn't there yet. Charles could feel himself sinking back into the abyss of darkness that had took months to get him out of but there was something else as he sat there in his silence, feeling the waves of anger roll off her. "Stop it." His tone giving a warning when he finally did answer. He didn't move from the edge of the bed. Not yet. "And Raven happens to be a darling friend. I've known her since we were little. We grew up together." He tried to control the slur to his words but failed the instant he heard them. "My love for her is something you would never understand." Then there was the other question in hand as the bottle flew across the room and shattered into pieces against the wall. 

"Stop trying to change me!" He rose from the bed and turned to stare at her. "I'm not the Charles / you / knew because I'm not that man yet!" Where was this coming from? It wasn't Jean that he was mad at it, it wasn't Jean that hurt him so why was he taking this anger out on her. "Stop trying to change me. Love me for who I am now! Not some git in the future that I don't even know if I'll leave that long. This isn't the future anymore, Jean. You live here now. In the past with a broken man and a beast and you bloody well better start thinking of it that way." Charles stop. He heard the words of his own voice echo in his mine. Stop before you say something you'll regret. "And if you can't except me for who I am, get the hell out!"

~

She hadn't' expected the sharpness to his words, her mouth opening to close again. Green hues seemed to downcast defeated by the echo of his words" I never knew I was such a bother to you Charles, I'll go." It seemed all trace of anger had left her,but the trace of anger still danced on her tongue. Her shield downcast where the phoenix could be seen tearing down those barriers but in this state she couldn't care. A slow blink and a few tears fell slowly down her face, she turned on her heel looking back to speak, but she couldn't bring her self to say a thing except for the faint whisper of her telling him goodbye. Walking down these steps had never felt so hollow not even Hank could stop and console her, nor would she turn around to grab clothes. Charles had bought them so he could keep them, she wondered if this was what he was a man who... no she pushed those thoughts away and walked out the door. Goodbye.

 

She had disappeared down the driveway nothing in hand and she had refused to look back to see if he was watching, finding her self in a pub wasn't exactly what she had wanted but she sat there none the less. Confused and lost her heart felt shattered only matched by the growl to her stomach, she refused to eat not that she had the money to do so. It wasn't until she felt the slight chill in the air that she became all to aware she was being watched, green hues scanning the bar she couldn't see a thing. No one who looked suspicious she did however notice the stranger take a seat in front of her. Brow arched she spoke lowly voice still a bit uneven " Can I help you?" It was than that this stranger showed her an act of kindness offering her a meal and conversation. He said his name to be Erik, and while some where that sounded familiar she couldn't be bothered to care she thanked him. The night went on like this, her talking and him merely trying to charm her, and she would be a liar if she said he didn't succeed. It wasn't charm in the since that Charles charmed her but it was the kindness he showed.

Back at the mansion Hank had managed to work his way up to Charles's room, slamming the door open he bellowed " THE BLOODY HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU CHARLES, SHE'S JUST AS GOD DAMN BROKEN HAS YOU AND YOU SEND HER OUT TO THE STREETS WITH NOTHING!" Normally Hank wasn't so harsh with his broken friend but today he couldn't bare to tip toe around how ridiculous his friend was acting. "She trusted you, and you just show her the door because she was JEALOUS you blasted fool, she was scared to lose you." His big hand raked over his blue face, he wasn't normally so irate with Charles but god he couldn't control his anger at the loss of someone who was so good for this house, for Charles."Consider this your last batch of serum until you apologize to her." With that he walked out the door slamming it and moved back down stairs to leave Charles with his thoughts.From that night on she had found a friend in Erik, he even told her of being a mutant showing her a few of his powers. She never made the link to it being someone she should fear. In fact it had been almost a month and while she had thought of contacting Charles every time she got to close she 

refused to go through. Things didn't last this way though eventually Erik showed his true colors on the night she discovered Raven at the bar with him, she could see the way she hung over him and it made her question. Shield dropped she could see exactly what she was telling him "Finally something to use, She's Charles new little toy he's allowed her to stay with Hank and himself. I think she possesses telepathy." Her breath hitched in her chest as she tried to move out of the bar, it was never going to happen has two arms wrapped around her and dragged her into the night.

 

Days passed before she finally awoke again the room wasn't something she was used to merely strapped into a chair, arms and legs bound she sighed. No she wasn't freeing her self, and something told her . She had found Magneto, which would make Raven Mystique her face fell as she thought about it. He walked forward wearing that helmet she would no longer be able to read his mind but she was pulled from her own thoughts has he spoke." Your a telepath and while I don't take kindly on torturing mutants, you are connected to Charles and I need him to come out of the wood works. Mystique tells me he cares for you which means your mind will be linked to his." With this he moved forward placing a bite guard in her mouth" Wouldn't wish you to bite that pretty little tongue off." He smirked strapping pads against her temples and walking back." Mystique make her call out to him." A flip of the switch later and her body was in agony, electric currents flowing through her she was lost in a world of pain. She kept screaming at her self to not give in don't call to him.

They kept at it for three days and she felt broken, her mouth dry and body weak she still refused to call out for Charles. Finally angering Erik enough he simply had Mystique deliver the information. She arrived at the school merely slipping a letter under Charles door and disappearing much like Jean had. They would get Charles to come play one way or another. It wasn't Charles who found the letter but Hank and he sat crestfallen in a dining room chair. There she was Jean bound gagged hurt and handwriting he didn't know, and yet he had no idea if he should actually tell Charles. This would only worsen his condition, hearing someone coming into the room he hid the picture under some old mail.


	20. Chapter 20

It broke him. Catching the tears that she tried to hide. He didn't mean it. God, he didn't but it couldn't take it back now. It was too late. "Jean." His voice was too weak to even span across the room as he watched her walk away. The bottle is released from his hand and falls to the floor with a clatter, walking over to the window. Pressing his forehead against it as his own tears threaten to fall from his eyes. He watched, watched as the woman he was starting to fall madly in love with walked down the driveway into god knows what and Charles Xavier was once again broken. His mind and heart shattering into a million places as he walked Jean Grey walk from his life. The tears fell. 

He didn't know how much time had passed, laid out on the bed, room a mess. Even the slamming of the door didn't bother him. Wincing at Hank's words. When did he turn into Beast. He was nothing more then a blue blur as he screamed at him for being an idiot and letting the best thing that had happened to him in awhile walk out of his life. He knew he was a moron, a bloody big git and there was nothing that he could think of that would bring her back. His powers suppressed by the heavy doses of serum that he had been taking. His mind his own but if he could, he'd strip it all away and will her to come back to them; to him and back into the safety of the mansion. His own personal prison. 

It was late that night when Charles made his way down to Cerebro. "Welcome, Professor." The pleasant female voice greeted him as the doors slowly shushed open. Dust particles blowing around in the light. Had it been that long? Charles just stood there, looking at the machine like it was a foreign object he'd never have the strength to take up again. It had been three days since they'd heard from Jean. The serum that was courses through his veins was starting to go away. Charles looked up at the ceiling, feeling himself more broken then before. "Please." His voice was soft as he called to whatever deity would hear him. "Please let me find her." The room goes black. 

The next morning, walking into the kitchen looking as if he'd had a bad few nights, coffee was the only thing on his mind. Saying a small "good morning" to Hank sitting at the table and he couldn't help but wonder what he had stuck under the stack of mail. "Leave it. I'll look at it." There was a brief flash of horror in Hank's eyes but he did as he was told. Leaving the room without a single word. Charles brow arched at Hank's behavior and he sat at the table, sipping at the coffee before going through the mail. The cup is heard hitting the floor of the kitchen with an echo as his fist slammed into the table. The picture broke his heart and he had not expected for Erik nor Raven to use this beautiful creature against him. Not again. Not with her like she'd told him they had done in the future. "HANK!" 

Charles concentrated, sitting once again in front of the same machine that he had prayed to several days before. It almost looked like stars before they seemed to turn into millions of tiny little people. Continents a deep red, mutants a bright white and humans were blue. "Find Jean." Those were the only words that were echoing in Charles mind. Suddenly, there was a gasp that escaped his lips and his mind's eye zoomed into room that held her. He couldn't see what Erik was doing but thanks to Raven, she gave a clear view of everything through her eyes. "Jean." Her name spoken softly from his lips and his anger toward the two ex-friends started to boil even more. Moments later, he was upstairs, grabbing Hank and they were out the door. 

"Did you find her?" Hank didn't even look at Charles. "Yes." His tone of voice sounded as lost as his mind did. He could already feel the serum leaving his body but he was fighting for control. Jean needed him to fight and hard. Pulling in front of the warehouse that housed her, Charles sighed. Why would him and Erik always be at odds? Why would he always use something that Charles cared about against him? Stepping out of the car, the door creaked open as Hank opened it. Charles was already starting to sweat as he walked into he darkness. "Alright!" His voice rang out into the open space. "I'm here. Let her go. You have what you want know." Hank was moving behind him in the shadows, waiting for anything that might happen. Charles couldn't loose her. Not her.

~

Over the course of days she endured the torment of bolts against her head, and now in one of the rare moments she stood head lolled back. The barriers that held the other her in place felt weak, the lightest of pushes might send her over the edge. Magneto and Mystique two mutants who should never be trusted, part of her couldn't believe that Charles had protected the blue skinned female . Pulled from her own thoughts she felt Charles at the fringe of her mind and she did everything she could to keep from calling out to him. No this wasn't her still be stubborn about the fight this was her refusal to let him sacrifice himself for her. She didn't belong here has it was, the world would roll on without her but not him . The future needed Charles Xavier, not just the mutants but the humans as well. She shielded him from her has much as she could before she felt the volts start coursing through her body again." God please...please" Green eyes shut in pain tears still fell down her pale cheeks. Her voice so weak as everything fell from her grasp her shield, the want to keep the phoenix at bay. If she passed she would simply return else where wouldn't she?

Magneto had left Raven in charge of Jean's treatment, as he went to tend to Charles. Moving with ease he was using his powers to basically hover in the center of the room " Charles I've been wondering when you were going to come out and play. Poor little Jeannie is almost burnt." The Cheshire grin that placed his face was one well enough to send Charles all the doubt he needed to question if she was still alive. Those steely eyes of his following Charles and his every move" You want her back don't you, or at least you want some revenge for all the wrong I've done to you. Or correct me if I'm wrong, the assumed wrong I've done to you." His voice was harsh that metal helmet rendering Charles's powers useless against Erik. They had been friends not to long ago, but they always had different views, Erik never saw the peaceful side to humans and he would always be blinded by the times spent at that camp when he was a child.

Raven had grown bored of torturing Jean, and was actually debating on just finishing the poor girl but this decision came all to late. Jean's barriers had finally given over The Phoenix, the monster awake. Who could it back to sleep this time, dark auburn locks seemed to set a blaze turning to fire her eyes rolled from green to flashing red. Her smile was devious mere motion of her will sending Raven choking and gasping in the other direction. A light pop of her own neck and the monster spoke" You won't die at least not by my hand, after all you freed me from the little vessel. She moved wit ease flames seeming to circle and wrap around her legs like vines, she left the room leaving Mystique nearly dead.

Magneto was still taunting Charles and he'd thrown Beast against the wall binding him with metal" Now now fuzz ball can't have you trying to free the princess, after all Charles and you have a habit of loving the same woman." Hank seemed to still hat his words angry written across his face. Of course he loved Jean but not in that way, he loved her like the way he had once cared for his own family. Magneto held him still eyes focusing on Charles." Someone's legs seem to be weakening, this is what you deserve for choosing them over us." If he was meant to say more nothing else would fall he felt the helmet removed from his head and his body thrown against the wall. Losing his grasp on Hank he was freed."What the hell?" Magnetos and Hank's voice seemed to say in sync.

Jean was gone merely throwing around who she saw fit " Now now Erik, you have a habit of using my vessel to suit your needs and I just can't have that." Her voice was deep echoing in the room. Even though dirty and grazed with burn marks and cuts she radiated beauty" I don't like when people damage what I own." Her voice seemed to hiss, this was Jean but this was what she was afraid of the monster Jean had wished to hide from Charles the man she loved. In this form she wouldn't even look at him but deep inside she was screaming for him to kill her to not let her ruin anything. She was willing to sacrifice herself again to save the world, because she would come back she may lose everything she cared for but they would be safe and that was what mattered to her.

The monster that was the phoenix was close to killing Magneto but she left him after awhile a mess she couldn't bother to kill. He and Raven would live but they would never forget this lesson. A lesson that although left him in pain made him want her, to own her to control her. Inside she was mentally begging and pleading for something to end her life, she didn't want to be this monster. She was also begging Charles to not try to use his powers, he'd tried it before and she had, she had... she couldn't even think of it leaving her a little more hollow. She couldn't kill him she wouldn't watch it again, she was fighting has hard as she could against this demon that wanted to set the world on fire.


	21. Chapter 21

"Don't let it consume you." 

It all seemed to be happening too fast. "You haven't done any wrong to anyone besides yourself, Erik." Charles tried to control the pain in his voice. He didn't know how long the serum was going to last but god, he hoped that it didn't fail him now when he needed some level of control. Words began to be spoken through gritted teeth. "And don't hurt her. She's done no wrong to you besides being what she is." His legs slowly started to buckle at the knees. Slowly Charles felt his body fall to the floor of the warehouse.

Pools of ocean blue watch as Hank is thrown against the wall, held in place by bent iron bars. All he could do was growl and try to fight against the metal that held him in check. It was a useless battle against Magneto. "I would say the same thing about you." Charles reply to loving the same woman came out snakier then he had meant it to but it was the truth. "You and Raven are destined to be in love but too afraid to do anything about it." Charles was now on his knees, his back screaming at him but he stayed straight. "And I choose the path of right, Erik. For all of us."

Charles turned his head in the direction of Jean as he heard Erik and Hank's voice at the same time. No, god no. She's lost control. Her voice, her actions weren't her own as he watched Erik being thrown across the room and landing against the wall, knocking him out enough so that Hank was about to remove himself from his confides. He didn't know whether to rush over to Charles or stay until Jean began to move closer to him and Charles rose his hand, signalling to him stay where he was. Charles had seen what this Phoenix could do and he needed to weigh his opinions.

"Don't let it consume you."

"Jean." Charles voice was as soft as he could muster with his condition coming back full force. Finally not being able to fight the pain as he crumbled to the floor. He knew that trying to talk to her with his mind would be a bad idea so he would take to the monster that had consumed her. "Phoenix." His tone taking on as much strength as he could. His had still held up to Hank to let him know to keep where he was. "I know that you've been hurt. I know that I've most likely myself done things to hurt you." God, he was in agony and it could show in his eyes, his face. Wishing for nothing more then the throbbing in his head to stop.

"Please. Let me help both of you. Because." Charles didn't know if he could honestly say what was running through his mind. It scared him beyond belief, thinking that he could love someone that didn't love him back. "Jean, please. I love you more then I probably should. I want..." His head was screaming at him as tears pooled in his eyes and his thoughts were slowly becoming lost to the world. "Please. Don't let it consume you. I love you."

~

In some part of her, the part that was still the female filled with love and so much care for her own race, her friends, Charles there was Jean. If anything could be said it was her mentally screaming in agony, she needed to be saved and just when everything seemed so bleak she was ready to accept death the loss of everything she held dear. She heard him " Don't let it consume you Jean." Those had been the last words she heard before she had destroyed him in the future and some how they took hold of her here. They brought her to the surface enough that she was shaking her head, feet moving backwards to say she wasn't ready to give in to the phoenix this time. Her body seemed to crumble to the ground has the monster hissed in protest.

She looked lost body broken and that pretty dress Charles had bought her torn in so many places, the phoenix winning was obvious by the bone chilling cackle that left Jean's lips." Help us darling please, you could barely help your self. Do you know why Jean was so ashamed of you reading her mind seeing the monster she tries so hard to hide. She's afraid because some sick little twisted part inside of her enjoys it, and a little hint love it isn't me." Voices seemed to be raging a war inside Jean's mind, no...no....no...nononono. I don't enjoy it god no I would never wish that on people, Jean was battling her demons and she wasn't sure if she was winning or not but she wouldn't let Charles or Hank be hurt this time. Those words seemed to echo in the back of her mind again drumming around and she clung to them tighter than a child held it's teddy bear. Somehow those words were what she needed to pull her self from the void.

Magneto had recovered and by this time was retreating while Hank and Charles were distracting the Phoenix, he wanted her but now would not be the time. Moving he left the building leaving Raven behind, the female could fend for herself not much more work and he had vanished. Hank stood there wanting to run to his friends side, and it was fighting every nerve in his body not to. His dark hues watched Jean how she was struggling with her self and god he wish there was something either of them could do."Charles...." This seemed to draw the woman's gaze and once more his friend held his hand up for silence. They would need to tread lightly less their dear friend kill them, though this would hardly be the first time it happened.

Jean was digging her self from the hole, and somehow Charles confessing his love gave her the last push she needed. Rising to the air fire seemed to consume her body before leaving her a mess falling to the ground. Neither Charles nor Hank would have been able to catch her, and by the time the moved to her side she was would be hot to the touch. Green orbs slowly returned to normal, the phoenix behind it's bars once more. her hand out stretched towards Charles before everything faded to black. The last she was able to do was return the I love you to his mind, her body beaten and sore she laid there un-moving. It couldn't even be said if she was breathing for sure.


	22. Chapter 22

He could hear her. God he could but he couldn't do anything. At some point, he heard the 'I love you' echo in his mind and it made him smile before he got the message to Hank to get her to the car. He could wait. His mind, broken and racing, and the pain. Oh god, the pain. It crippled him more then it ever had before. The days of almost O.Ding on the serum where starting to catch up with him. The last thing he remembered was being picked up off the floor before he blacked out. Even his mind was now closed off. 

When Charles woke up, his mind was nothing but fuzz. The light coming through the bottom windows and even it was too blinding right now. His whole body arched, sore from whatever happened, he couldn't remember. A groan from his lips as he tried to rose his head from the pillow but it just ended up causing him to be dizzy. It wasn't until he felt a warm body pressing against him, arms wrapping around his waist and it helped to jerk him from the haze of his mind. "Jean." Her name was soft on his lips and he moved the best he could to lean against her as well. 

His eyes fluttered as he felt a pair of soft lips press against his own, his hand moving to tangle with auburn curls and a moan escaped them. Moving the best that he could before pulling her on top of him, the kiss deepening with each passing second. The serum now completely wore off and he couldn't feel his legs but that didn't stop the feeling of his erection pressing against the fabric of the boxers that he had on. "Jean." Her voice soften spoken once again as the kiss was broke, her lips soft against his neck before biting at the nape. A sharp cry escapes him at the feeling of her teeth and he wished to the gods above that he could thrust his hips, even the slightest of friction against a throbbing cock. 

A bright flash and whatever dream Charles mind had thrust him into was lost. He cursed under his breath as his eyes shot open. He was in his room, alone. The joys of a wet dream. He wanted to know if Jean was alright. His mind blank at the moment, no voices, no pain, just that damn throbbing between legs that he couldn't move. It almost made him want to cry out as he shifted to throw the blanket over his head. "You aren't a teenager, Charles." He all but growled at himself as his hand slide down his boxers and he took his cock in his hand. Not being able to do nothing more then pump himself and wish the dream hadn't ended. 

She loved him. God, she told him she loved him. The muffled moan escaped his lips as he pumped his prick under the blanket and he could just see her. Possibly in the bed or in the shower, her slender fingers rubbing against herself, dipping between her lips to play with herself. God, help him. Softly saying his name as she rubbed her clit and fucked herself with his fingers. It was too much and he came with a small cry, her name on his lips and his seed spilling against his hand. What was happening to him? He left his hand where it was. Charles Xavier, the broken Professor, the shell of a man that he was once, let himself cry. Sobbing against the blanket that covered his face and he let the tears flow. God, he wanted someone, something to hold. To tell him that everything was going to be alright and that he wouldn't have to go through this alone. But, the bleak reality was that he was alone.

~


End file.
